With everything going on in the world today, and so many events affecting us, it can be difficult to identify what we are feeling at any given moment. It is safe to say though, that each one of us has been able to identify feelings of worry, anxiety, or fear. It is important for us to learn to identify which emotion is actually present: anxiety or fear.

There are differences between these two emotions, even though they can show up at similar times and feel the same within the mind and body. Despite how similar they are, the ways we cope and deal with them are different. 

Anxiety exists like a cloud, and can have anywhere from a slight influence on how we feel to a tight grip on our thoughts, narratives, and behaviors. Sometimes it might be hard to identify why you feel anxious, and that can perpetuate the feeling. A good friend and psychologist once said to imagine anxiety as a cloud that is always with you. Now imagine that the cloud is attached to one end of a rope and that you are attached to the other end. When we feel the anxiety and pull away from it, the cloud pulls back just as hard. We then find ourselves in a standoff and spend energy that we actually need to save. Instead, imagine that we just stop pulling on the rope; the cloud no longer has to pull in the other direction. The rope goes slack and we have space to take care of our needs, whether that is exercising, engaging in mindfulness, talking to a loved one, or getting creative. The anxiety will still be there, but without that perceived grip and control over us.

In contrast to anxiety, fear is a more definable emotion. Usually we can identify what we are afraid of, whether it is of spiders, or someone getting angry with us, or being trapped. We can describe it and can share it with others. We can effectively deal with fear by clarifying what the fear is actually of, “feeling the fear, and doing it anyway.” The more we expose ourselves to our fear, the better the chance we can pay attention to what that feeling may need from us when we face rather than avoid it, what helps the fear diminish, and under what conditions we might not be afraid anymore of what we were fearing.

In summary, face fear head on with all you have: to engage with it and learn how to work with it more effectively. With anxiety, let go of the rope and stop resisting so you can feel how letting go can help you take care of yourself!